CAN WE BE LONELY AND HAPPY?

Play it before you read........




'Pursuit of Happyness' is an all time favourite movie of mine which in turn made me a big fan of 'Carpenters'!


There is a background song in the movie called 'This Masquerade', its a beautiful song, written by Leon Russell and it was included in the Carpenters album 'Now & Then' released in 1973.


The song has a beautiful line in it-"Are we really happy with this lonely game we play...."(hope you have turned on the speakers), and i loved that song the moment i heard Karen Carpenters voice!(I guess that was a BLiNK effect!).


So this blog is inspired from that line! It made me think why do we feel lonely? Why do we feel happy? Can we be lonely and happy? and if being alone is loneliness then why do we sometimes feel lonely even though we are in a crowded place?


Sorry if i confused you all with those questions!


I think loneliness is a state in which we have no one to talk to though we desperately need to talk to someone, so in this case we avoid being lonely or it is a state in which we just want to isolate ourselves from everything around us, so in this case we choose to be lonely.


What about happiness?


In his book 'Shantaram', Greggory D Roberts has given an interesting definition of happiness as 'Happiness is a myth which was invented to make us buy things' (Girls are gonna hate this!!).


I think happiness is like a switch in our mind which goes On and OFF!
Some people are happy because their switch is ON most of the time while its the other way round for unhappy people. The best part is we can control that switch but do we know how?


So is being lonely a good thing? Of course not, after all man is social animal!


But at times we are forced to be lonely by the circumstances then what to do? I think we should be comfortable with it!


How?


By talking to ourselves.


When i was in school, a teacher advised us to develop a habit of talking with ourselves.
She told us every time before sleeping we should ask ourselves questions like:


How was my day?
Did i make any friends?
Was i rude to anyone?
Did i commit any mistakes?
What did i learn today?


She used to say by asking these questions we are actually analysing ourselves and more importantly improving ourselves!


And the best way to talk with ourselves and to be comfortable with loneliness is to write a diary.


Our brain has two minds one good, the other bad.
Put yourselves in a situation wherein you are in a shopping mall and your eyes caught a 1000rs note(genuine) lying on the ground.
First to speak is the bad mind, it tells us to grab it before anyone else sees it.
Then the good mind tells us to return it somehow to its bearer.


The best thing about writing a diary is that when you write a diary the bad mind totally shuts off! So the good mind guides us and helps us to understand ourselves.
I once read a quote by Mac West(I don't know who he is/was!) it said,


"Keep a diary & someday it'll keep you."


So true. When we write a diary we are not only saving our memories but we are also saving the time! And time is money(no you wont save money by writing a diary!).


One of my new year resolutions for this year was to start writing a diary(I was inspired by Sanjay Singhania!) and i do it almost regularly. Believe me its a wonderful habit. When i turn a few pages and go through the good times i have spent with friends i actually live those moments again!


Someone has said,"It's so lonely when you don't even know yourselves."
And friends when we write a diary we actually start getting all the answers to all those questions we have been avoiding asking ourselves, and we start understanding ourselves!
And yes we can be lonely and happy.... just try to keep that little switch of yours ON for most of the times..




So that's it friends....
I appreciate you as you had the patience to read this long blog.
The views expressed in this blog are according to my perception, comments are welcome!